I resonated with Simon Sinek, as he passionately explained in his TED Talk lecture, “Start with Why,” that humans gravitate toward others when they hear the ‘why,’ behind the ‘what’ and the ‘how’ of their work in the world. It is the ‘why’–the underlying belief, the compelling reason, and the experience [...]]]> By Jessica Chilton

I resonated with Simon Sinek, as he passionately explained in his TED Talk lecture, “Start with Why,” that humans gravitate toward others when they hear the ‘why,’ behind the ‘what’ and the ‘how’ of their work in the world. It is the ‘why’–the underlying belief, the compelling reason, and the experience leading us to our particular passion and purpose–that magnetically attracts us to one another.

I felt immediately inspired to share more of my personal story that led me to create SPARK Creative Wellness Studio and offer my great work to the world.

May my vulnerability and honesty about my Big Why invite you to take a step closer as we develop our trusting connection. And, may reading this story also inspire you to discover and share your own Big Why with the world. My Big Why I have experienced Life’s wrecking ball.

I have experienced my sister’s suicide; I have experienced being diagnosed with fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, and rheumatoid arthritis and hardly being able to function; I have experienced the stresses of growing my own business and wondering if I might fail. I know what it is like to respond to life’s challenges as a victim. I know what it’s like to hate my life and hate myself.

AND, most importantly, I know what it’s like to make a decision to change–to choose to invest in my own positive development, reach out for support and guidance and transform my way of being in the world. Each time I have decided to invest in myself and receive support and guidance in navigating life’s challenges, I have made significant steps forward in my path to loving myself and loving my life.

Now, I feel so much gratitude for Life, my family, my friends, and all who have been my great teachers, guides, companions, supporters and inspiration along the way. I wake up each morning and give thanks for the opportunity to live another day. I treasure the moments in this amazing body, even with its limitations, as it moves me through the world.

Now, I truly love myself. I accept all the parts of me that make up my wholeness–darkness and light, dull and shiny, challenges and triumphs. I celebrate my uniqueness by letting my Spark shine. I take care of myself, knowing that when I am thriving I can give so much more to others.

I believe that anyone, no matter what wrecking ball swings through their world, has the opportunity to love themselves and their life. I believe that our challenges can be the greatest turning points–inviting us to find our way to self-acceptance, self-love, self-trust, and self-worth.

Our challenges can become the messengers calling us home to who we truly are. They invite us to invest in our own potential to grow. They wake us up to our next lessons and discoveries as we learn to love what is, while evolving toward our dreams.

Because of my challenges, I discovered an artful path to Creative Wellness; now I serve as a guide to other women who are ready for this journey. These pivotal experiences ignited my Big Why, my Spark, which now offers its light to you through SPARK Creative Wellness Studio.

“I welcome expansive love, abundance, health, and success into my life and inspire others to do the same.”

Encouraged by Gay Hendrick’s, The Big Leap, this has been my mantra recently. The first day when these words came out of my mouth as I held the vision of enjoying a [...]]]> By Jessica Chilton

“I welcome expansive love, abundance, health, and success into my life and inspire others to do the same.”

Encouraged by Gay Hendrick’s, The Big Leap, this has been my mantra recently. The first day when these words came out of my mouth as I held the vision of enjoying a great life now and always, I realized quickly that I had resistance. I became aware that some part of me was really resisting feeling this good–feeling like I live the complete dream life.

Life has indeed been feeling so great — full of love with my husband, satisfying success in my business, vitality running through my strong body, and increased abundance flowing into my life. Why was I resisting something so wonderful?

I soon discovered I had, what Hendrick’s calls, an “Upper Limit Problem,” a glass ceiling that I put above me in order to stop myself in my positive tracks. Because I have been doing so much stretching, growing, and expanding this year into my fullest potential, I was suddenly bumping up against a limiting belief that felt like my head hitting the ceiling.

We each have our own version of an “Upper Limit Problem” and our own garden variety of limiting beliefs. In my case, this glass ceiling comes from the limiting belief that ‘it is bad to outshine others’. I feared that if I became too successful, if my life climbed into even higher states of fulfillment, if I shined my brightest light, I would make others feel bad. Because I didn’t want others to feel bad, I was adding guilt into my picture to stop myself from feeling too good.

It’s amazing what a good dose of self-awareness can do for a person. I quickly remembered that playing small does not serve anyone. Dimming my light does not assist anyone who is navigating the darkness. Suppressing my gifts only deprives the world from its riches. And constricting my potential only models for others the deprivation of the freedom to be all that you are.

I have remembered that Oprah, for instance, does not make me feel bad. On the contrary, I love Oprah for being as hugely impactful as she is and I feel inspired to be even more courageous in my offerings to the world because of who she is and how she lives.

So, I continue to say my daily mantra, and I am now enjoying it without any guilt. Indeed, I have released myself from being responsible for how anyone else chooses to feel; after all, we each can only be responsible for our own feelings. And, I have let go of the limiting belief around outshining others; welcoming in a new belief that “I am born to shine. And so are you!”

It is incredibly liberating to welcome expansive love, health, success, and abundance, and to inspire others to do the same. I encourage you to repeat you own version of this expansive mantra out loud and notice what arises. Open your senses to your potential glass ceiling and see what you find. Notice what limiting belief is ready to fall away, as we each step into our greatest potential and let our SPARK fully shine!

My Dad has taught me so much in this lifetime.

More than anything, though, I will always remember his frequent assertion that “the most important things in life are love and relationships.”

And, he would add, “We are each here on Earth to help each other get through [...]]]> By Jessica Chilton

My Dad has taught me so much in this lifetime.

More than anything, though, I will always remember his frequent assertion that “the most important things in life are love and relationships.”

And, he would add, “We are each here on Earth to help each other get through the challenges life brings.” In this case, I like to think the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. And this apple sure is proud to come from this grand tree!

Right now my Dad and his life motto are on my mind as one of his closest friends died this week. This friend, the wonderful Rudy Miller, was the kind of man who would light up a room. Unfortunately, he was also a man who endured a 9-year battle with dementia. Although my dad and Rudy had enjoyed a friendship before things turned tough, they became even closer as the challenges became more and more severe. This is when my dad really walked his talk and let his belief about the most important thing in life shine through each interaction with Rudy.

I have been shaped by witnessing the tenderness of one grown man helping another get through the most basic daily functions of life. Their adventures together, from day-trips to my dad’s construction sites to week-long golf trips, continued even as Rudy lost his mental and physical abilities. Dad stayed open to evolving and adapting as Rudy’s needs changed; and Rudy seemed to keep trusting and loving my Dad, even as everything else slipped away.

 As I talked with Dad today about how much we love and will miss Rudy, I concluded by saying, “You were a stellar friend.” What I really meant was…

 Thank you, Dad, for being the kind of man you are– the kind of man who knows what he believes and lets this guide him always–especially when things get tough. Thank you for teaching me over and over again, through your way of being in the world, the most essential lesson of life–love and relationships are #1.”

Unfortunately, nearly 1 in 2 people in the U.S. are living with a chronic health condition, which makes this a concern for all of us. It is easy to feel unsure of what to say and do when we hear our loved one share their pain. This article is here to [...]]]> By Jessica Chilton

Unfortunately, nearly 1 in 2 people in the U.S. are living with a chronic health condition, which makes this a concern for all of us. It is easy to feel unsure of what to say and do when we hear our loved one share their pain. This article is here to support you in this conversation and ongoing relationship.

When you are listening to your loved one discuss her challenges with illness, offer compassionate acceptance of her current experience while also holding a vision of her fullest potential of wellness. Here are 8 simple steps to offering empowering support through simple conversation:

1. Be present. In our fast-paced busy lives, making time to stop doing anything else and simply being present is a significant gift. Being present is an art-feel the ground beneath your feet, sense your whole body, notice your breath, and bring your mind back to the present whenever a thought, judgment, or distraction passes through your awareness. Be truly present. The rest is icing.

2. Listen. Give an opportunity for your loved one to express whatever she needs to without trying to fix the problem or give advice of any kind. Experiencing illness can be very isolating as no one else is able to truly feel what you are feeling.

3. Reflect back what you heard. When your loved one hears you express what she said in your own words she experiences a healing sense of being seen, heard, and understood.

4. Accept her and the situation exactly as it is in this moment. Breathe and give all of your attention to accepting her present reality. This is very different than pitying her current challenges or settling for the idea that this illness will persist forevermore in your loved one’s life. Offering acceptance is a powerful act of bringing peace rather than struggle into the moment at hand.

5. Ask if she is open to hear how you see her and her life. If she says ‘yes,’ move forward with step 6 in the process. If she says No, let her know that you will be happy to share whenever she is ready. Ask if there is anything else you can support her with in this moment.

6. See your loved one in her highest light. Envision her empowered, vibrant in her wellness, radiant in the beauty of being all that she is, fully utilizing her gifts and strengths, letting her unique SPARK Shine. Feel love for her in your heart and notice all that you love about her. Imagine how she was as a baby-a beautiful new being in the world. See her moving forward toward her dreams while taking care of her body, mind, and spirit. (The Creative Wellness Practice below will further develop your ability to see others in this way.)

7. Share this positive vision to remind her of her true essence. We are each here to remind each other of who we truly are at our core. It is easy for each of us to get off course, to disconnect from our inner Spark, to forget that we are born to shine. Be in service of your loved one by reflecting back her power and potential and believing in her as she continues her journey of life.

8. Educate yourself on resources in the community that offer the support your loved one seeks. It is good to remember that you are in her life as her friend, partner, mother, daughter, or sister; you are not her therapist, coach, doctor, or any other wellness professional. Keep your ears and eyes open for who is in the community who could be of service to your loved one. Just making the connection, opening the door, could be a life-changing act of service.

It’s so easy to underestimate the power of Acceptance. There’s nothing sexy about it. There’s nothing Big and Bold and Exotic about it. Rather, it just is, exactly as it is.

I often talk with clients about how easy it is to want to take one giant leap from challenging point [...]]]> By Jessica Chilton

It’s so easy to underestimate the power of Acceptance. There’s nothing sexy about it. There’s nothing Big and Bold and Exotic about it. Rather, it just is, exactly as it is.

I often talk with clients about how easy it is to want to take one giant leap from challenging point A to jolly point B without first sitting with A, sitting with what is, and accepting it and our self in it, exactly as is.

I often hear, “I don’t want to accept it. It’s not my best self. It’s not how I want my life to be. It’s not how I want them to act.” The idea of Acceptance often is misunderstood as settling for something you don’t want, agreeing to something undesired, or admitting defeat in some way. There is a misconception that when you accept something you have to give over your power, in a victim-like or subservient manner.

In truth, Acceptance is something much more empowering. It is your ability to dissolve your struggle with the reality of the moment. It is connecting with your compassion for the imperfections of self, others, and the world. It is your ability to release your judgments and general mental overdrive, to see clearly what is inside or in front of you without a negative reaction or resistance. Acceptance is calling upon your highest self to embrace the present moment, just as it is, with the warmth of your loving heart.

And, the truth is, Acceptance, while focused on making peace with the present moment, is also the fertile ground for lasting transformation. Inspired actions toward a new direction in life emerge from the compassionate loving state of first accepting yourself and your life as is. I have come to see Acceptance as the Queen Medicine for all challenges and the King Catalyst for creating positive change in our lives. It certainly has tremendous power in its peace.

Because Acceptance has been one of my big lessons in life, learned through my struggles with illness and pain in my body, I have become quite the Midwife for bringing acceptance into the lives of others. It is so satisfying to see the softening face of a client who is learning to love a part of herself that she previously had rejected as bad, ugly, or unworthy. It is beautiful to witness the resistance dissolve when a client accepts fear, anger, and sadness, and lets it move through her. It is inspiring to see the discontent dissipate when Acceptance walks across a client’s ‘grass is greener on the other side’ perspective.

And, it is my greatest pleasure to see the suffering soften when a client lets go of her hate-fueled fight against an illness. Instead, she allows Acceptance to show her how to befriend the illness, that before seemed like the enemy. She finds a way to make peace in the midst of an inner battleground. And from this place, this solid ground of Acceptance, positive healing can transpire and transformation can flourish.

I invite you to take this moment to ask yourself, “What would change if I welcomed the peaceful power of Acceptance more fully into my daily experiences? How might the magic of Acceptance improve my relationship with self, others, and life?”

We all face limitation in life. Finding the freedom within these limitations is the key to creating a life we love, no matter what!

Some limitations are universal. As far as I know, we are all mortals. (Although I’d love to know if this is not the case for you). Our [...]]]> By Jessica Chilton

We all face limitation in life. Finding the freedom within these limitations is the key to creating a life we love, no matter what!

Some limitations are universal. As far as I know, we are all mortals. (Although I’d love to know if this is not the case for you). Our limited lifespan in this body is our ultimate limitation. We also all have 24 hours in a day and face the limits of time as we juggle all our responsibilities and desires.

Some limitations are personal. You might be experiencing limited money flowing into your life. You might have limited help caring for your child as a single-mom. You might see limited job search opportunities right now in your community.

Some limitations are physical. Perhaps your body doesn’t digest gluten well. Maybe your body is in pain which inhibits your ability to move with ease. You might have an illness diagnosis that points to limitations in your body’s optimal functioning.

Limitations come in all shapes and sizes. They are common to the human experience. The most important thing about limitations, is how we choose to respond to them.

Remember this: where there is limitation there is also freedom! If every time we hit up against a limitation we allow it to be a reminder to tap into freedom, indeed, all shall be well.

10 Freedoms that Help You Create Your Most Satisfying Life… even in the face of limitation.

1. The freedom to accept what is, rather than fight against it.

2. The freedom to take good care of yourself, knowing that your wellness is the foundation for being able to give your best to others.

3. The freedom to treasure your time and energy and use them in satisfying ways.

4. The freedom to activate your inner-healer and believe you can create positive transformation on all levels-emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically.

5. The freedom to choose where to focus your attention, knowing you feel better when focusing on freedom rather than limitations and healthy thoughts rather than unhealthy thoughts.

6. The freedom to see yourself through an empowered lens of beauty, wholeness, optimal health, and full potential-choosing to release limiting beliefs about yourself.

 7. The freedom to choose how you share yourself with the world, telling empowering rather than disempowering stories and exuding positive rather than negative energy.

 8. The freedom to create a home environment that feels good, letting go of energy-draining clutter and creating your space to intentionally reflect what you love in life.

 9. The freedom to choose to act from a place of love, letting this love flow through you into your relationship with self, others, and the world.

 10. The freedom to act as a creator rather than a victim in life, taking personal responsibility for the fact that everything you do, feel, say, think, sing, believe, and envision is a choice.

 Go forth, dear one, and live from a place of freedom!

Check out our New SPARK Video and discover how you could benefit from cultivating your Creative Wellness.